In a session this week with a dear friend, she told me that I'm hard on myself; something that I know and often forget. She reminded me of many things, one big one being that I need to spend more time celebrating my wins.
As I sat with this wisdom, some photos also popped up in my memories. From 11 years ago. Photos that feel like a lifetime ago.
This year has really challenged me. Probably more than 2020 and 2021 combined. Somehow that was possible. I've beat myself up, a lot. Asking myself what I've done wrong and how do I correct it. Processing fear that I'm going to backslide so far that I'll never come back.
When I saw this photo on the left, of 11 years ago me, the words of my friend sunk deep into my heart.
The photo on the right is this week me.
Like ok Danette, stop beating yourself up so much.
That woman on the left is almost unrecognizable to me now.
How could I ever think I would end up back there? That simply isn't possible.
Life is cyclical. There's ups and downs. Between illness and hormone/thyroid changes this year, I've been in a bit of a valley. But it's not forever. I'm heading back toward the peak, slowly, but surely.
And that woman on the left reminds me of my strength, endurance, and courage that got me to here.
I can do hard things.
As another dear friend said, this path may not be for the faint of heart, but I have a warrior spirit and Kali in my veins.
I'm reminded that I fucking got this. And in this knowing, I can relax. I can soften my edges. I can allow Kali to put down her gas can, and I can find my grace in floating with this current.
The energies we're moving through this week are pushing us through the eye of the needle. Pushing us to stare down the elephants in the room and remove them once and for all.
It's fucking messy and uncomfortable. But there's a strange comfort in knowing that we're not going through it alone.
So if you're feeling the pain and pressure of being squeezed through the birth canal, hang in there. Stay with it and keep going. It may not feel like it right now, but you're heading in the right direction. You may need to stop for a minute to look back and see just how far you have come.